Maybe-Never

Sometimes you just want a chance. The chance to feel completely loved by someone.

I've always been the girl with all the guy friends...and that's it. Don't get me wrong I love my guy friends...but sometimes watching other girls have that dating relationship and never getting a chance is heart breaking. Yeah, its probably a good thing I never had to deal with relationship drama. But God has placed so many wonderful Godly men in my path and I've been really good friends with them...but when do I get a chance. With college there comes a lot of pressure to find the one you'll spend your whole life with. After college your suppose to start your career and your family. You won't have as many opportunities to meet people. So you've got 4 maybe 5 years to find someone if you haven't by then. I've never even dated (that's kind of embarrassing to admit, but I've been okay with it.)

Now I want that chance though! I've been dealing with the thought of possibly never getting married...I don't know if I'd be okay with that or not. Honestly, I would love to just focus on the ministry God has called me to and that be it. But...Would I be happy enough doing that without someone by my side? Am I ever going to be good enough for someone? I can't answer these questions. Only God knows what's in store for my life...but I am becoming impatient and my heart is growing weary.  

I don't know if I'll ever get married. If I don't I will have to be happy enough to know that's what God wanted for me...to know that God will use that for His glory... I will have to be okay with that.